letter_to_santa edit

A letter to Santa for the war on Wonkville
zippy 90 Comments

Shy plans to poke his head in Poopville later this week to take care of the various upgrades and other maintenance that needs to be done here. He asked for a wishlist/Jeb! can fixit list from us for Wonkville, so put whatever wishes, bitches, whinging, requests, begs, etc in the comments and I will sticky this post so he can refer to it when he stops by. And remember kids, KEEP IT CLEAN! (or not, I don’t give a shit and I’m sure he won’t either). Also too, one winner will be chosen at random from all the entries in the comment thread* so vote early, vote often…

 

P.S. Shy, unsticky this post once you’ve seen it. That way we’ll know you’ve stopped by. I tried leaving out a plate of cookies, but Blue keeps stealing them. He keeps mumbling something about feeding the old blues musicians, but I think he’s talking about himself…

 

*Shuddup, the winner won’t actually win anything. What do you think this is, Publishers Clearing House?

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90 thoughts on “A letter to Santa for the war on Wonkville”

  1. Dear Santa Shy, all I want for Christmas is a fix for the upfist/downfist so if someone accidentally downfists a comment they can reverse it. And maybe a pony, if you can steal one from Dok while he's not in the chatcave…

    Reply

  2. I thought we were supposed to fill in the blanks? To wit:

    Dear Santa,

    This Christmas I am too damn many years old.

    This year I have been good some of the time (not yelling "what the fuck is wrong with you?" at every driver who cuts me off does too count as being good sometimes!)

    What I would like most this Christmas is world peace and a Democratic sweep next November.

    And I promise to leave out a bottle of red for you!

    Merry Christmas, Santa!

    Love,
    Callyson

    PS: please say hi to mom, dad, and grandma for me!

    Reply

  3. I can't think of much to change but I guarantee I'll think of about 7 things about a week after the maintenance is already over. That's how it always works.

    Reply

      1. Can't we mods fix those already? Or do you mean opening up to anyone or something else entirely and I'm just dense?

        ETA: What about a way for mods to get notifications for pending posts (but not comments, that would get old fast)? Or maybe a mod bat signal for when changes are needed?

        Reply

          1. Weej, if you want to be able to fix your own typos we can always just ask Shy to make you a mod if you want.

  5. Wait–is this where the debate liveblog is taking place?

    If so:

    Dear Santa,

    And in my stocking, can I please see The Donald go down in flames tonight?

    Kthxbai,

    Callyson

    Reply

    1. Oh yeah, that. Anything that's not gray or black would be really nice. I knew I was forgetting something, thanks CR!

      Reply

  7. The only way I know to post a picture with title is to save it to my own computer then upload it here. Not an intolerable burden, but shouldn't there be a way that's one or two steps shorter?

    Or am I the only one who doesn't know how to post a link at the top of a post?

    Reply

    2. I'm not sure how that would work otherwise, because the alternative sounds like it would just be a picture link to another site instead of an upload. Maybe I'm missing something and am too used to having to save/upload everywhere though.

      Reply

    3. That's how I do it too. Fyi that in the back room, all those images are saved – WordPress creates an archive of them for us. So maybe it's something to do with that, re why we need to upload the images from our computer. It might cause problems for WordPress, if we don't upload from our computers. I.e., WordPress has no control over what another site does with its images, and if an external site removes that image then we may lose the image too.

      I have no idea what I'm talking about…

      Reply

  8. Dear Shy,

    It would be ever so loverly if the links to whatever thingy we linky to would show up when you click the "Read More" linky. Does that make sense?

    Happy Christmas and have fun with the Wonket fambly! Which reminds me, moar pics of the Wonket babby!

    Reply

    1. Yes, what Cmdr said about babby. I don't know why, but every time I see pics of Donna Rose it makes my day better. I'm not being snarky, it really does lift my spirits to see pics of that bubbly little munchkin.

      Reply

  9. Dear Shy,

    Thanks for teh new Wonkville! It is so much better than the old Wonkville! Yay! I have been good all of the time, except for that one day when I fucked everything up. What I would like most this Christmas is… soy sauce and tampons. And I promise to leave some tamales out for you, even though I am not a Messican. Please say hi to Becca and the Wonket Babby for me.

    Reply

  12. Hi Shy,

    New Wonkville is still awesome, and I think we all love, love love it.

    Re compiling a fix-it list, I actually had made a list after we screwed things up a few months ago, but I can't find the list. I wrote down all the things that we had screwed up. I wish I could find the list, but of course I can't, and I think my eyes have gotten used to things the way they are now.

    That said, here's what I can think of right now that was on the list:

    1) The "Read More" option used to say "Do Comments." (which was so much snappier)

    2) The way to access the article for each post is reversed from how it was when you first set up the new Wonkville. Now the image, and the hyperlink link to the article, and the headline links to the Wonkville post. I think that the image used to link to the Wonkville post, and the headline used to link to the article? It's not a big deal, but I always get confused and link to the wrong thing. Maybe it's just me.

    That's all I can think of from my list, but also, if we could have a time stamp next to the date for each post that would be nice, i.e., submitted Tuesday, Dec. 15 at 1 p.m., but if that's complicated we can live without it.

    Also, what C_R_eature and Snow said about the hyperlink color would be incredibly handy.

    And finally, I think I speak for all of us when I say: Can we have a T-shirt cannon?

    Thank you!

    Reply

    1. I loved the "Do Comments" button. It is much snappier.

      Although, I have to respectfully disagree with you on the t-shirt cannon issue. Potato gun or get out!

      Reply

        1. Potato guns for all!

          Fun fact, years ago, in high school, (of course) a friend of mine, who went on to a career in engineering, built a potato gun out of the usual materials (PVC pipe, duct tape, and, um, I don't know, potatoes.) Anyhoo, we were all getting shitfaced on Schlitz and he decided to bring out the potato gun. I was convinced the damn thing wouldn't do anything, but, then, BOOM! A potato went flying! I said, "I bet you couldn't hit that window from the road." The road was about 50 feet away or so and he went to the end of the driveway and fired. BOOM! The young fellow whose house it was got this look on his face like "OH FUCK" and actually attempted to dive in front of the window. He tried to take a potato for the house. He missed. The potato hit, dead on, shattering one panel of the bay window. It was awesome.

          Reply

          2. Btw, if you can't get a can of Schlitz from your local liquor store (they may have finally, mercifully stopped producing the stuff) get yourself a can of old-fashioned Miller if you can (not Miller Lite, not Miller Genuine Draft, just regular Miller) or, if you can't, a can of Bud or Coors will do. Then, pour roughly 6 ounces of that can into a pint glass and add about 4 ounces of water. Then, and this is key, add about two ounces of the animal urine of your choice: cat, dog, wombat, sloth, alpaca, whatever, your choice. Stir it up with a coffee stirrer made of horsetail and then you have yourself a proper Schlitz! Also, a proper Blatz, also, too.

          4. That reminds me of when some artist friends were working at the Johnson Atelier, and figured out they could use the forge to make their own cannon. Which they did, and took to a park to test it. It worked. They ran away, then read in the paper the next day about the poor sucker whose bathroom was demolished by a cannon ball that had the police puzzled.

  14. I fully endorse the undownfist and visible hyperlinks suggestions. At a less important level, the links to the actual articles are weird. On the main page, the title of the article just loops back to what you're looking it, and there's a plain html link to the article below. If you go to the comments, these get switched. I don't see the point of the loopback, but if ID insists on it, consistency would be nice. Yes, my little mind is beset by hobgoblins.

    Reply

    1. Agree. What each object links to switches depending on if it's on the main page or the post page. I don't care which way it is, as long as it's consistent on main page to post page. My brain can't handle the confusion. Glad to hear it's not just me.

      Reply

  15. I agree with the suggestions listed so far.

    On a personal note, could Shy find out why all articles posted from this computer for about the last 3 months have gone to moderation. The problem started when I used the word 'penis' in a headline, but I didn't think that would cause permanent problems.

    Thanks.

    Reply

    1. As a data point, this very comment of yours ended up in moderation, too, and had to be manually approved. Maybe you should stop talking about male body parts? Or at least spell it with a 1, like the real men do :)

      Reply

          2. Not sure about the comments thing, but the posts to moderation seems to have to do with IP address. I noticed that when I housesat for my relatives for a week and then came home, it suddenly didn't recognize me for the first three posts they went to moderation again.

          3. I've had that happen when I'm traveling (though not as often as I'd expected), but it is happening at home now. It's a fairly recent thing.

          4. It does seem to hate certain IP addresses. A couple of regulars have everything end up in pending, even though they've done well more than 3 posts. (Maybe their addresses change up more often than usual?)

          5. interestingly, the one I just posted sailed through. I wonder if there isn't a cookie or other marker of some sort keeping track of the 3 posts rule stored locally, because I had recently done some major housecleaning in Chrome and that could well have been the fourth post since then.

  16. Hi Shy!

    I'm a little slow on the uptake this week, but now that I have actually read what this post was intended for…

    When I want to get back to the main page of Wonkville I have to scroll all the way to the top and click on "WONKVILLE" to do so. For Wonkette, the header stays at the top of the screen so I can just move the mouse up there and go to the home page. A fix like that would be good.

    Definitely agree about the differentiating font color for hyperlinks. Ditto for reversible downfists.

    Thanks, and have a good holiday!

    Reply

          1. Picked up this CD of Fahey doing a radio concert in 1973 the other day. Talk about precision playing:

            http:/amazon.com/Record-Plant-Sausalito-September-1973/dp/B00Q9B54S2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1450413703&sr=8-1&keywords=sausalito+record+plant+fahey

          4. I appreciate the recommendation. I am Fahey-sympathetic, or Fahey-adjacent, still trying to find my way in. We hipsters are notorious for usurping an arcane musical tradition, and then enjoying the heck out of it.

  18. Something else I just thought of: Is there anything that can be done to fix the thing that sometimes happens, where the word, "delete" repeats until it takes up the whole line? #THOUGHTZ.

    Reply

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