Welcome to the first of 15,000 Republican debates! Starring Nope, Governor Nope, Senator Nope, Other Governor Nope, Other Senator Nope, Other Other Senator Nope, Former Governor Nope and aw fuck it, Nope, Nope and Nope!
I'm expecting a commercial break in the middle of this where Ron Paul runs up on the stage and yells incoherently about how the world financing markets are about to collapse.
I'm not watching. I'll just rely on good ol' Wonkville let me know what's happening. Especially since SOMEONE went to bed early tonight. (Sleepy behbeh! Awwww!)
"Hey, ladies, I want to shove a bayonet up your twat! I mean, I want an armed soldier in your gyn exams. Yes, that is actually what I meant. Vote for me!"
Trump is the only one talking about Mexican immigrants! No one has ever mentioned them before! TRUMP INVENTED ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS. They are all Mexican rapists and gold-plated.
Dammit, I had a livestream up from Yermany and decided to refresh the browser because it was being all glitchy and such.. BAD IDEA. Now the server's down and I can't watch all the clowns! Boo!
It's cute how they all want their own trademarked issues. "You have illegal immigrants? Well I have dibs on Islamic terrorists! Too bad, Christie, you get stuck with Hugs."
1.) Is America awesome, or Super-Awesome?
2.) Did God tell you that you will be the next president, and if so, was he lying when he told your opponents the same thing?
3.) Describe your ideal date with Roger Ailes. Be specific.
Rand Paul doesn't think you need to register your marriage with the government? Someone needs to see if he's been living in sin and taking illegal tax deductions for years.
Note that this was just the first link that came up but here's a thread to laugh at Trump when he inevitably says something stupid.
And already a bad hair fight!
Christie's hair stylist is in the wings calling for an emergency time out.
Question 2 is also a process question! Yeah process! Boo policy!
And Doc Ben has 67 honorary degrees! What the WTF?
Liberty has that many campuses?
Wow. Richard Feynman vowed at his graduation to never accept one, and he didn't.
I like how Trump only managed to last about a minute and a half before being booed.
Rubio fires the first Class Warfare shot!
Welcome to the first of 15,000 Republican debates! Starring Nope, Governor Nope, Senator Nope, Other Governor Nope, Other Senator Nope, Other Other Senator Nope, Former Governor Nope and aw fuck it, Nope, Nope and Nope!
I'm expecting a commercial break in the middle of this where Ron Paul runs up on the stage and yells incoherently about how the world financing markets are about to collapse.
Did Trump just ask Megyn for a date?
I like that you can tell they all, debaters and moderators, hate each other as much as we hate all of them.
Imagine what the hate's going to look like when February comes around.
I'm just imagining the hatefuck gangbang that's going to happen right after this.
Three of the debaters in the lower one literally went out together to get steaks after they finished. It's only the next logical step.
KASICH SAID A NICE THING ABOUT TRUMP, EVERYONE HIDE
Ewww… childcatcher from chitty chitty bang bang alert! 😮
Yeah! Cheer for people saying being nice is bad! Such an amazing view!
I'm not watching. I'll just rely on good ol' Wonkville let me know what's happening. Especially since SOMEONE went to bed early tonight. (Sleepy behbeh! Awwww!)
Huckabee just called for coming after pregnant women with military troops!
Well, it's about damn time someone said what we're all thinking!
Huckabee literally just telling half of America "fuck you, I don't want your vote"
"Hey, ladies, I want to shove a bayonet up your twat! I mean, I want an armed soldier in your gyn exams. Yes, that is actually what I meant. Vote for me!"
He's being "bold," I guess.
Smart move on your part. Kid Glass watched it, I avoided it. I've got enough stuff to distract me lately.
All right Wonkville scientists: WTF is a "DNA schedule"? What time does cytosine get to this stop?
I think he meant midiclorians!
Use the Force, Huck!
That's a common question- remember, the hypochondria are the "power plants" of the worrying cells.
So when is he going to bring out his Trump card?
Ouch.
Now, Donald, now!
RELEASE THE DONALD!
BUILD THAT WALL!!!
Donald Trump is in serious danger so close to the scary foreign country of Canada ;_;
Smoke break!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0yADZZ7jvY
Trump is the only one talking about Mexican immigrants! No one has ever mentioned them before! TRUMP INVENTED ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS. They are all Mexican rapists and gold-plated.
lol CNN already fact-checking Trump:
Fact check : when trump went to the border he didn't meet with border patrol. They bailed on him under pressure from Washington.
Dammit, I had a livestream up from Yermany and decided to refresh the browser because it was being all glitchy and such.. BAD IDEA. Now the server's down and I can't watch all the clowns! Boo!
This one? http://www.livenewschat.eu/the-republican-debates…
Yep.. I got it to load again just seconds ago.
Truth be told, I turned it on, heard the ROAR for Kasich being introduced and then turned it off. Watching the Twins lose again is much less painful.
Woo!
<img src="http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a900/a900.gif?v11301bss2">
It's cute how they all want their own trademarked issues. "You have illegal immigrants? Well I have dibs on Islamic terrorists! Too bad, Christie, you get stuck with Hugs."
A major political party debate had a shouting match over hugs. wtf?
"You hugged him!"
"Oh, yeah, well, you hugged him harder!"
Jeb! really needs the exclamation point after his name. He's the Stannis Baratheon/dishrag personality of the lot..
Wonket dings now! Wow!
That's actually the sound of Megyn's labia cymbals.
I think you're giving her too much credit.
…labia cymbals…
And I consider it a bug, not a feature.
It's started? crap. I'm still working. I'll catch up later.
https://twitter.com/nthnryn/status/62946830369870… lmao
They booed reading and math. They booed reading and math. THEY BOOED READING AND MATH.
IT'S THE DEVIL'S WORK!
"weapons of maths instruction"
morons, all of them
The stream I'm watching has this freaky deaky muzak on commercial break. Nice!
"father was a mailman" is the new "dad worked in a mill".
So Kasich is going to boink his photographer also, too?
"And I'm going to get rid of anyone in his line of work when I become president!"
https://twitter.com/THEHermanCain/status/62947232…
Herman Cain is even tired of this shit.
I like how a bunch of replies are just "Agree."
Conform! Conform! Conform!
I'm enjoying some mixed nuts. This is not a euphemism. There are too many almonds. This is a euphemism.
"Hey Chris, did you read my book The Art of the Deal?"
"I'm qualified because I ran several businesses into the ground! I'll do the same to America!" -Donald Trump
"Pffft! I ran a whole state into the ground!" -Scott Walker
"yawn. my brother ran the US into the ground"- Jeb
A culture of life? Like bacteria?
Every petri dish is sacred.
Meanwhile Chuck Schumer quietly just went "no, I don't like the Iran deal."
Every person should be in charge of their own healthcare*!
* Whoa, not you, women of reproductive age.
Let Lois from the church group do your sonogram at a CPC! She always hears the tiniest of heartbeats even at six weeks!
Government so small it can fit inside a uterus!
1.) Is America awesome, or Super-Awesome?
2.) Did God tell you that you will be the next president, and if so, was he lying when he told your opponents the same thing?
3.) Describe your ideal date with Roger Ailes. Be specific.
Rand Paul doesn't think you need to register your marriage with the government? Someone needs to see if he's been living in sin and taking illegal tax deductions for years.
That's hilarious coming from someone who thinks gay marriage shouldn't be legal.
"We can't let gay marriage destroy traditional marriage! The only solution is to outlaw all marriage!" Brilliant.
gay marriage is in no way connected to smoking pot or lower taxes, so libertarians are ambivalent on it
#freetedcruz is a real hashtag now. Apparently they didn't realize that each candidate's going to get like no time with so many on-stage.
They need buzzers, like on real game shows.
Yo, Donald, the fucking deal hasn't been signed yet. Guy flew to Russia. What are you gonna ACTUALLY do other than say disparaging things?
"I'd call him incompetent, but that's not nice."
Help, I thought he wanted to be mean, is he flip-flopping already? Has he been taking lessons from the Massachusetts Pancake?
"Everybody: shore up or reign in?"
Oh, Fred Schneider is not older than you, Huck.
THAT"S WHO RAND PAUL LOOKS LIKE!
Meth, guns, fear, and a bunch of semen-stained copies of the Bill of Rights.. Kentucky Love Shack!
Ha, Huckabee's claim that the military only exists to fuck shit up is already making people insane.
"Jesus loves me, this I know…"
|I believe in miracles| Huck's campaign song!
You know, you'd think they'd have learned from Clint Eastwood that trying to yell at someone who isn't there doesn't go over well with most people.
confidential: big fat raindrop shower here again tonight. enough to wet the road!
Bless you, god for your snot is salvation for us all.
Crap, there was a live-blog here too? Damn, if I had known…
Oh well: I'll try to remember next time!
Come on, Cally. Do try to keep up.