128 thoughts on “Football Open Thread: Dog Day Afternoon

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      1. ╭━━━━━━━———————╮
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        ┃█ Come outside, ███┃
        ┃█ I've got the ██████┃
        ┃█meme ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ████ ┃
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  1. Wow. According to ESPN's crawly, ticker thingy, the Lions have lost the past 24 games to the Packers in Wisconsin, including playoffs. Apparently, the last time they beat the Pack in WI was pre-Favre days. Yikes.

    Hey, shel, did you ever see a Packers game at old Milwaukee County Stadium? I've heard those games were insane. I lived in MKE for about 3 years and those people are fuckin' nuts.

    1. smokey: "Oh my god! He's not Linda Blair, for fuck's sake!"

      Edit: Also, was he OK after that? Did he have to come out?

    1. Kind of glad I'm not getting that game, because it's frightening to think how much effort the Packers have to be putting in to SUCK THIS MUCH.

  2. I'm sick of this creepy Acura commercial where the guy puts his "dummy" family, including his "dummy" self into the car for a test crash. Stop it, Acura! You're creeping everyone out!

  3. Just got back from a training run to see that, one, my team's game was on here (OK, KCBS, for once you don't suck on football Sunday) and two, we managed to win despite the fact that half of our players are in the hospital. #suckstobeaclevelandsportsfan

    1. at least last week they put up a good fight and a valiant effort. Now we have to deal with the Viqueens at the top of the division

  4. @harrisonquinn90 15 seconds ago

    the packers did the equivalent of only shooting fadeaways in 21 bc their mom is making them let there brother win

          1. I'd be happy about that if I hadn't see too many games where the Patriots managed to come from behind and pull it out.

    1. Addition to this: The favorites in the games active right now are the Raiders, Patriots, and Broncos. All three are losing.

        1. There had to be some sort of retaliation response- it was inevitable. The real question is whether or not we see ground troops- from France, us, Britain, NATO?

          1. if he's smart, he'll let France lead the way- of course, then every RWNJ in the country will call him an incompetent coward

  5. Holy shit–Peyton got benched.

    I work with a Broncos fan–I'll have to remember to be very nice to him next time I see him FFS…

    1. Between that and dating former TDS correspondent Olivia Munn, I suspect Aaron is our kind of people. And good for him for calling that out.

    1. because the only person who sucks worse than Eli is Coughlin. How the hell you have first and goal with just over 2 minutes left and manage to neither score a touchdown nor take a decent amount of time off the clock is a mystery to me

    2. I'm no football fan, but the Pats pulling out a squeaker against the Giants? Aren't they allowed some karmic payback? Also, fuck you, Giants, you play all your home games in NJ, you're not the NY anything.

      1. No, the Pats are cheaters so they get no Karmic paybacks- I hope they go undefeated right up to the moment it counts, then get their asses kicked in the playoffs, just for the extra lulz of all that humiliation. The Giants do indeed suck for the reasons you mentioned, plus by virtue of the transitive property Eli Manning sucks because he is related to Peyton Manning, who sucks the big one…

          1. Meh, it just gives you more heart burn after the World Series ends, through the beginning of February.

          2. it actually was real good. And yes, Cubs are in a good position to do things next year. They're shoring up some holes like pitching and it's a young team that's growing into being great.

  6. Glad I don't live in NJ anymore so I don't have to spend the next week hearing about how that was an interception and the Patriots stole this (which is kind of a good point, but I don't want to hear it).

    1. Someday the Giants will realize that they will always suck until they fire Coughlin. He consistently breaks their hearts with moments of greatness, only to fold and give them a 7-9 or 6-10 shit sandwich at the end of the season

  7. Thanks for the moment of silence, Seattle. But fuck that fucking asshole who shouted "ISIS sucks!" during it. Fuck you, asshole. Shut the fuck up.

    Also, lovely rendition of the Star Spangled Banner by that Staff Sergaent (I missed his name. Freddy Garza? Is that right?) It would have been really meaningful if, at least at one game like tonight's, they had sung La Marseillaise.

    Also, too, to hell with Carrie Underwood. Give me Joan Jett or give me nothing! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPkTGm4RtVM

    1. The thing is, it really didn't look that bad, even with the replays. The next thing you know, there's a damn ambulance on the field. I just heard that Iupati has feelings in his extremities, so that's a good thing, at least.

  8. Actual ESPN news alert on my phone: "From a tree stand in the woods, Brett Favre congratulates Peyton Manning for breaking his passing record."

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