I always remember one morning years ago when you could hear Roberts' dog barking in the background of her commentary. She came on the next week and explained that it was done from her home. Bob Edwards then couldn't resist playing a clip of a listener who called in to say, "I guess any son of a bitch can get on NPR."
I heard that one too and thought "Jesus, she is literally phoning it in."
Really. The pre-debate commentary thus far, in a nutshell: "The Democrats are about to debate here in New Hampshire, but first, some thoughts about Donald Trump, Jeb Bush, Marco Rubio, and Ted Cruz."
I'm counting how many times "Climate Change" is mentioned, relative to the Republican debates. So far, the Dems are halfway there (1 1/2 for the Republicans, if you count sarcastic asides).
Interesting rhetorical technique so far: Bernie (can I call you Bernie?) refers to Clinton and O'Malley as "Secretary" and "Governor." Hillz refers to them as "Bernie" and "Martin." I'm not convinced O'Malley has actually spoken yet.
I wish I were as optimistic as Hillz that this nation can unite around sanity, but seeing eight years of ever-worsening insanity from the wingnuts makes me wonder…
My theory is that if the national sentiment shifts somewhat toward sanity, it will be a sudden and dramatic shift, rather than a gradual shift, because that's how these things seem to happen.
I saw Mandy Patinkin on Colbert last night and he was going on about how we need to build hospitals and schools and Syria and, after having several vodka gimlets, went off about the condition of this country. "Have you been to the Bronx? Have you been to rural West Virginia? Have you been to my home county in small-town Minnesota? Have you been to one of the reservations in North or South Dakota? We need that shit here! Now!"
I love Hillz for her potty breaks and Sanders for his shoutiness and O'Mally for his blandness-ish-ness. They can be interesting and intelligent and still have their charming quirks.
O'Malley should have come up with a better attack against Hillz, he should have realized that of course she'd have a watertight response for exactly how he framed that.
Hillz is doing a much better job of defending herself against the "Wall Street lackey" charge than she did in the last debate. I still would like to see her come out for restoring Glass-Steagall, but this is sounding good so far.
Yes. I was worried that she would not have gotten the message about that last time but she seems to have gotten the message. Also, on Glass-Steagall, she would do herself a huge favor if instead of just saying that her plan does way more than GS, if she first harped on bringing back GS, PLUS building on it – it's just a matter of optics, but I think she's win more people over on that plank if she's frame it that way.
That moderator needs to stop interrupting Hillz. He should have gotten a clue a little sooner. That was uncool and poor judgement.
ETA: He didn't do that to Bernie just now. There are so many studies on how men interrupt and shut down women so much more than they interrupt men, and that they are more persistent in it when they interrupt women.
He scared the 2000 GOP in Ohio enough that they gerrymandered him away from their districts. I have no idea how he does it. My worry is that would he make enough of a difference in Ohio to offset the possible loss of a Senate seat?
Nah – we had peppermint brownies, gingerbread men, homemade peppermint ice cream, barbeque(beef chuck and pork), mac and cheese, buns, coleslaw, and baked beans.
"So, Hillary, if you are elected, the First Lady will be a man. That would be weird, right?"
(Also, come the fuck on, Bernie, you don't need to play to your douchebros by playing up what a good mommy your wife is. She's a professional woman. That was gross O'Malley gave a much better answer than you..)
Ok, we're talking about flower arranging and presidential spouses and NOTHING ABOUT THE MOST CONSEQUENTIAL MULTILATERAL TREATY THE MODERN ERA HAS EVER SEEN AAARRRGGHH
Someone on twitter noted that every time they hear, "May the Force be with you,", their Catholic training makes them want to say, "And also with you." Phew, it's not just me.
And it's not just Catholics! (Assuming you are/were one.) Even this lax Lutheran had that response. It's the one thing I remember because that usually meant the damn sermon was finally over. "May Christ be with you." "And also with you… Yay! We can leave now!"
Glad I caught the title of this submission–I was on the rear naked choke hold story thinking we'd be there.
And those of you who are skipping the pre-debate commentary are missing NOTHING.
I had the ABC stream on the Roku thingy, they said it would be 20 more minutes, then they cut to COKIE FUCKING ROBERTS for commentary.
Then I turned it off.
Even John McLaughlin is tired of yelling at her that she's "WRONG!" He has been since the 80s.
I have to yell COKIE FUCKING ROBERTS in the car every Monday when she phones in to NPR. It's positively Pavlovian. I think it frightens some people.
I always remember one morning years ago when you could hear Roberts' dog barking in the background of her commentary. She came on the next week and explained that it was done from her home. Bob Edwards then couldn't resist playing a clip of a listener who called in to say, "I guess any son of a bitch can get on NPR."
I heard that one too and thought "Jesus, she is literally phoning it in."
Really. The pre-debate commentary thus far, in a nutshell: "The Democrats are about to debate here in New Hampshire, but first, some thoughts about Donald Trump, Jeb Bush, Marco Rubio, and Ted Cruz."
They had Nate Silver on for about 10 seconds, to say a sentence reminding us about how important the Iowa primaries were .
It was edifying.
Turns out we can have more than one sticky post! Yay! (Or, if this turns out to break Wonkville, uh, my bad!)
THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING
IT'S A GAME CHANGER
PARADIGM DISRUPTOR
|This seems appropriate. |
Always.
"I look forward to this evening's discussion of real issues…"
Nice swipe against the GOP, Hillz!
Bernie Sanders, the Anti-Establishment Candidate. Stick it to the man.
I'm counting how many times "Climate Change" is mentioned, relative to the Republican debates. So far, the Dems are halfway there (1 1/2 for the Republicans, if you count sarcastic asides).
OK, I am glad they are asking about terrorism. I just hope that, unlike CNN, they don't spend THE ENTIRE FUCKING DEBATE on that topic…
I just asked smokey if this debate has a "theme," like the last GOP debate. I'm not sure.
Are they wearing Star Wars costumes?
Yes. Bernie is a Wookiee.
"|Yowl|"
And Hillz is some burlappy Ewok.
The older she gets the more she looks like Shirley Jones. She's totally going to win the presidency.
I'm looking forward to the brightly colored block-painted Presidential Bus.
YES! "It really came together when mom sang along!"
They should probably leave this bit off.
<img src="http://telstarlogistics.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2008/01/24/partridgebus03.jpg"/>
Interesting rhetorical technique so far: Bernie (can I call you Bernie?) refers to Clinton and O'Malley as "Secretary" and "Governor." Hillz refers to them as "Bernie" and "Martin." I'm not convinced O'Malley has actually spoken yet.
Who are these adults on my teevee?
I think it's some kind of speculative fiction piece.
There have been a lot of primers on the internets this week, so I know this: Chewbacca, Leia and Jar Jar Binks.
That makes a lot of sense.
Trump! Drink!
"We need a coalition here at home"
I wish I were as optimistic as Hillz that this nation can unite around sanity, but seeing eight years of ever-worsening insanity from the wingnuts makes me wonder…
My theory is that if the national sentiment shifts somewhat toward sanity, it will be a sudden and dramatic shift, rather than a gradual shift, because that's how these things seem to happen.
I saw Mandy Patinkin on Colbert last night and he was going on about how we need to build hospitals and schools and Syria and, after having several vodka gimlets, went off about the condition of this country. "Have you been to the Bronx? Have you been to rural West Virginia? Have you been to my home county in small-town Minnesota? Have you been to one of the reservations in North or South Dakota? We need that shit here! Now!"
Bury our hearts at political sleaze.
Yes. This.
Fisticuffs!
They've lost control of the debate already. Things are progressing about how I expected.
After seeing Niagara Falls for the first time, the philosopher Herbert Spencer wrote in his diary:
"Much as I had expected."
Why is Bernie so shouty? I thought his people would have talked to him about using his indoor voice.
"We need to send a strong message…" Drink!
Hillz: let's bust the gun lobby's balls. With votes of course.
This works well with hanging chads.
<img src="https://www.slugger.com/Media/SLGR/Wood-Sub-Landing/1116_n_a_l.jpg" width="550">
"Nobody on the Republican side will even admit there is a problem."
There's your Theme, cmdr
Next time, could we have a sort of Brazillian Carnival theme? We need more feathers!
And sparkling costumery.
I stopped myself from calling for more sequins. I will not make the same mistake again.
Why aren't they talking about important things, like how too many women are having sex outside of marriage?
What about the War on Christmas, too?
And bombing Agrabah!
And banning Calligraphy!
"Governor Malley, STFU. We'll get to you eventually."
– ABC
"Encryption", a new terrorist tool? Where has Martha Raddatz been the last 15 years?
Boning Alan Greenspan? Oh, wait, that's the other one.
Tim Cook: ISIS' best friend.
Facebook: terrorrist playground.
Huffington Post: sideboob!
Steve Jobs: Still billing Satan for those Black Sabbath songs he bought years ago.
I want my freedoms!
O'Malley telling a folksy story about a Muslim he knows! Drink!
Oh God, that story O'Malley is telling about the Muslim kid who is worried that The Donald could actually win is fucking sad…
Ever since that "inshallah" tweet of O'Malley's this week I like/respect him so much more.
Sorry can't stay longer. Mrs. weej and I have a local pol holiday party tonight. Time to play pin the tail on the tehRump.
Enjoy! Don't be naughty – you-know-who is watching.
(The NSA, right?)
Indeed. (Hi guys! Where are all of my dick jokes?)
Grab some bacon-wrapped shrimp, first thing before they're all gone.
Protip: Ziplock bags in your jacket pockets. Leftovers rock.
Rules!
We're gonna move on.. up. Bernie. We're movin' on up!
Bernie: I want to address this issue.
ABC: Rules are rules. Moving on…
Does Raddatz use SAE 90 on her hair?
PAM.
Her eyeliner is a little overstated, also too. All I notice when she's on camera.
I don't think she tipped the stage make-up pro enough.
SPAM.
Nobody but lunatics would want tens of thousands of American ground troops in the Middle East, fighting ISIS (DAESH).
So, y'know, Republicans.
Hillz: this is a question with a false choice.
GOD, I cannot wait until the general election debates…
To true. tee hee.
She will carve up her opponent like a Japanese carving knife through an oven-browned Thanksgiving turkey. "Who wants a drumstick?"
I just donated some more to Bernie, but I'm prepared for Ready For Hillary!
"False Choice"! DRINK
Still waiting for just one fucking question about the economy…
ETA: Dok said this debate is intended to focus on foreign policy. You'd think they would have pointed that out in the intro FFS…
Oh, Foreign Policy, right. Anything else happening out there. Treaties, perhaps?
"Would you shoot down a Russian airplane?" Jesus H. Christ Martha, this isn't the Republican debate – there's sane people here.
Somebody has watched Top Gun on VH1 too many times.
Too many Tom Clancy novels.
Smokey is now quoting "Bad Santa" at me and this debate: "Where's your sleigh?" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKNrYb0s3xc
Ugh, everyone sounds terrible when talking about terrorism: "We must do more! Harder! Faster! And then, some more!"
Hawt, though, when you say it.
The mods do seem to like cutting off Bernie and M O'M. I'm no conspiracy theorist but this is getting weird…
DWS has pew-pew interruption mind control lasers in her hair.
We want Tulsi Gabbard!
"Anything else going on in the USA? No? The World? No? Ok back to Middle East Terrorism then!"
Well, the Jets are up 9-3 over the Cowboys midway through the second quarter so, no.
"If you won't send young soldiers into the meat-grinder, what will you do?"
Pfft.. the middle class?!
Pee break! Drink!
Hillz leaves the stage to have her people wipe the lipstick off her teeth. She is SO in control.
Is this the "half way mark"? I've learned nothing.
Hillz: "I just took a mad dump".
That was odd. "She can't be trusted!"
FINALLY the fucking economy!
I can confirm that the Democratic debates don't fill me with fear & loathing nearly as much as the Republican ones do.
I love Hillz for her potty breaks and Sanders for his shoutiness and O'Mally for his blandness-ish-ness. They can be interesting and intelligent and still have their charming quirks.
They can get as weird as they want. I like the fact that all of them are competent and not ideologically hidebound.
Yes.
Well then, let's all move to Baltimore.
Amorphous! Drink!
Crepuscular! Drink!
All right I'm cooking a couple of pork tenderloins. What internal temperature should I take them out at?
150, but maybe less if you let them stew in their juices– 145.
I'm no gastroenterologist or anything, but probably at least well above room temperature. Like, at least, 98.6 or so.
Uh….ew? They're in the oven, not a body cavity.
150 or so, with a 3 minute rest. Do you have a meat thermometer? I always thought that "Meat Thermometer" would be a great punk band name
Lothar and the Hand People?
Big Blow and the Bushwackers
Tender Nubbins and the Anti-Trichs
The common sense and good ideas from all of our candidates makes me proud. God, I really cannot wait until the general election debates!
Now we just need to get out the vote.
That's so important. The turnout in 2014 was like 37 percent fer chrissakes.
Economy? Raises? Equal Pay? Raising minimum wage? Free college? Prescription prices? Finally.
Crazy talk! WHAT ABOUT THE WAR ON RELIGIMUS FREEDOMZ
What about Benghazi!!!
EMAILZ!!!11!
O'Malley should have come up with a better attack against Hillz, he should have realized that of course she'd have a watertight response for exactly how he framed that.
I like Marty, but he's way too green to win the Presidency. Maybe in a few cycles.
Hillz is doing a much better job of defending herself against the "Wall Street lackey" charge than she did in the last debate. I still would like to see her come out for restoring Glass-Steagall, but this is sounding good so far.
Yes. I was worried that she would not have gotten the message about that last time but she seems to have gotten the message. Also, on Glass-Steagall, she would do herself a huge favor if instead of just saying that her plan does way more than GS, if she first harped on bringing back GS, PLUS building on it – it's just a matter of optics, but I think she's win more people over on that plank if she's frame it that way.
Nice aggressive framing of the "Obamacare" question Martha. Your Liberal Media at work.
No wonder they kicked her off NPR.
Any bets on whether these awful mods will ask about the Paris climate change breakthrough?
60/40 against.
College education costs now? I thought this debate would be all about killin' them furriners!
"Govenor O'Malley, seems we have a question for you, too."
"Why are you flesh-colored?"
"Why are you here again, Gov. O'Malley?"
"You were Governor of where, again?"
France?
Damn, it's not my imagination–these mods really are being dicks to Bernie. I'm frankly glad he was able to talk over him FFS…
They're being dicks to all three of them in different equally dickish ways.
Is this why DWS scheduled it for 8 PM on the Saturday before Christmas?
"Dancing With the Stars"?
"Now this is getting to be fun." Good one, Bernie!
That moderator needs to stop interrupting Hillz. He should have gotten a clue a little sooner. That was uncool and poor judgement.
ETA: He didn't do that to Bernie just now. There are so many studies on how men interrupt and shut down women so much more than they interrupt men, and that they are more persistent in it when they interrupt women.
ETA: He's doing it again.
My fave is when they interrupt you, and you try to finish your thought, and they are, like, "EXCUSE ME, I WAS TALKING."
I have a manager at work who does that constantly. Completely lacks self awareness. But then again he's pretty normative.
These mods seriously suck. I really hope they don't get a chance to cover a general election FFS…
Unfortunately, I'm sure they'll all get a chance. Debate moderation is not a meritocracy.
"Now this is getting to be fun!"
Damn, these moderators suck even more than the CNBC ones in that GOP debate did…
Why are we listening to these talking heads again? FFS, can't this commentary wait until the debate is complete?
Maybe they're paid on a piecework basis: so many $$$/minute of air time.
They should just read the best tweets about the debate. It would be more interesting and it's what everyone else is doing anyway.
"Ferguson effect my ass. FBI Director Comey is an asshole." That's what I'd say.
So from what I've read so far it sounds like the debate moderators are being total assholes to everyone?
That would be an accurate analysis of the situation
"Ferguson Effect" = Police holding back from kicking the shit out of some deserving punk on the street, for fear of getting on YouTube.
"Political corrrectness" = treating other people with dignity and respect. Who needs that shit?
In my day, we didn't have any fancy "Political Correctness" terminology. We had to get by with "not being an asshole".
Trump doesn't have time not to be an asshole. He said so.
I know that he's got natural talent and all, but he had to have taken advanced asshole courses at some point.
"In my day, we were rude and treated people like shit, and they said thank you, sir."
Over the break somebody dusted the dandruff off Bernie's jacket, thank goodness.
538 just threw out Sherrod Brown as a possible VP choice. Not sure if want.
No. Loose cannon.
Hmm…maybe, though I remember thinking that about Joe Biden, and I'd say on balance he has been a net positive for Bamz.
He scared the 2000 GOP in Ohio enough that they gerrymandered him away from their districts. I have no idea how he does it. My worry is that would he make enough of a difference in Ohio to offset the possible loss of a Senate seat?
Why are they talking about helping drug addicts instead of shaming them?
Back to foreign policy? Didn't we already spend half the debate on that topic?
Fuck these mods with a chainsaw of crappy ratings…
Forget it Cally, it's Saturday Night.
I had a party. We drank a lot of 40 yr old port. Is there something involving politics happening?
Yes–the NFL Network has the Jets – Cowboys game on.
So, are the Jets having traffic problems?
Judging from the current score (3:44, 3rd Q) the answer is yes.
Looks like I'll end up losing in the quarterfinals again, yay!
No, Go ads sit on the couch and listen to some classical.
We just finished listening to X, and the Sugarcubes.
Good choice.
Shit, that's a weird juxtaposition. I haven't heard 'Life's Too Good' in probably over 20 years. (I think I may still have a cassette)..
Riding on a bicycle, I saw a motorcrash.
X was how I met teh MsAnthrope. I have a giant crush on Bjork.
Adults are talking.
Shit, don't need none of that.
Well, the moderators are petulant children so it's not all bad.
And ABC mentions Trump at the breaks so it evens out.
Trump? Drink! (hoo-boy. I hope it's over soon.)
Do you need some strawberry cake? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoMG_7N5vUY
Nah – we had peppermint brownies, gingerbread men, homemade peppermint ice cream, barbeque(beef chuck and pork), mac and cheese, buns, coleslaw, and baked beans.
Wait. were we at the same party?
Hillary, you're totally responsible for the catastrophic nightmare that is Libya today. Aren't you sorry, just a little bit?"
Talk about Pinochet! I raise my freedumb for a junta!
So if the moderators at ABC are childish, do the Wonkville moderators get a chance to run a debate? We'll ask questions about poop, squids, and bees!
So, what is your plan for gluing bees to things?
"Poop, Squids and Bees" will be the newest Amazon bestseller, eclipsing by far "Eats Shoots and leaves"
Really, Martha? Did you really think that was a question that will benefit voters? Dear god.
OFFS…a question about what Bill Clinton will do if Hillz gets in?
They're not even phoning it in now. I'm checking in on the game, BBL…
Put the local pizza places back on speed-dial?
Ian's? https://ianspizza.com/
Yes, cause we all know that he's a man, so he is important.
They're one step away from calling her Billary.
"So, Hillary, if you are elected, the First Lady will be a man. That would be weird, right?"
(Also, come the fuck on, Bernie, you don't need to play to your douchebros by playing up what a good mommy your wife is. She's a professional woman. That was gross O'Malley gave a much better answer than you..)
Aw, Bernie. You're classy.
Ok, we're talking about flower arranging and presidential spouses and NOTHING ABOUT THE MOST CONSEQUENTIAL MULTILATERAL TREATY THE MODERN ERA HAS EVER SEEN AAARRRGGHH
And Martha went to Brown. The Best and the Brightest.
Ugh. | "Give the people what they want" |
<img src="http://i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/912/665/49b.png" />
Thanks, that helps.
You just made this just now, didn't you?
Went on a huge reaction image-hunting spree last night. I have loads to use now!
<img src="https://media1.giphy.com/media/oPGQ9fyuxhNTy/200.gif" />
"So, George, no comments from Donald Trump?"
Governor O'Malley, how many kids do you and your lovely wife Katie have? Are they terrific?
Hillary: if the GOP gets the White House in 2017, Armageddon will occur.
Well, she's right you know…
She is. Her fear-mongering is different than Republican fear-mongering because her scary things are reality-based.
Armageddon. Drink. Heavily.
CLIMATE CHANGE FINALLY THANKS MARTY.
Now, an in-depth discussion would have been nice, but…
So, you think that Climate Change is a bad thing, right?
What's Climate Change done for me lately?
Sea creatures taking over the earth. I see no downside.
Excellent point. Come on, Greenland!
A starfish would be better than the current governor of Florida.
I don't see how they could cock it up worse than we have, really.
I, for one, welcome our echinoderm overlords.
Closing Statement: Hillz NAILED IT.
"May the Force be with you"? She is Leia!
"And may the force be with you!"
Nobody can accuse Hillz of not knowing how to please a crowd!
Well those closing statements weren't laughable. They were substantive and Hillz' was even witty. What is wrong with these people?
I want my money back.
The Republicans want your money, too.
I'll burn it first.
Maybe he went to go mod ska dancing?
Sorry! |????|
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aErNjERoLJM Where the hell is Bill? Is what she was asking.
I got it, thanks.
Argh talking heads MUST CRUSH NOW
Turning to CNN for some insight. Sippy Cupp. Never mind.
I'll wait until tomorrow, for the astute political analysis of CSPAN's Washington Journal callers.
Haha, just kidding. Those people are all monsters.
"Can I shit in your mouth?"
"Now on the Republican line, we have Dave who has a question about | Mitt Romney's huge penis." |
OK, time for the game. I sure hope the commenters here are better than those ABC ones were.
I have, like, 14 different Wonkville tabs up on my browser right now. Am I addicted? Do I need help?
I'm not even sure how you can have enough things on Wonkville to fill 14 tabs!
Yes, but not because of that.
Yes. No.
Someone on twitter noted that every time they hear, "May the Force be with you,", their Catholic training makes them want to say, "And also with you." Phew, it's not just me.
And it's not just Catholics! (Assuming you are/were one.) Even this lax Lutheran had that response. It's the one thing I remember because that usually meant the damn sermon was finally over. "May Christ be with you." "And also with you… Yay! We can leave now!"
I thought the guy that played Lax Lutheran in Smallville was pretty good.