11 thoughts on “Can You Get Raw Vegan Pizza From Dominos?

  1. I saw a cheese-free pizza come out of the oven, on one of our (rice-based) gluten-free crusts. A few veggies were on top of it.

    Seriously, we do bread and we do cheese, and we do cheese on bread. Why the fuck are you ordering from us if you want neither? It wasn't even drunk o'clock yet, either!

    As for the story here, protip: if you're on the lam, use cash instead of plastic.

  2. A great deal of fungus, as will be made readily apparent if the uncooked dough is left at room temperature for too long, hastening its journey from "grapefruit-sized rubber balls" to "bubbly soup." Verily, overly happy yeast often results in pan pizzas generating a central bubble that results in what I refer to as a "pizza doughnut."

    Other than that, I'd say it's half-and-half whether a vegetable topping is fresh (onions, spinach) or canned (black olives, jalapeños). The default cheese is officially dubbed "pizza cheese" ("made with real mozzarella," but the added processing is mostly about keeping it from clumping, because mozzarella), but the other cheeses are legit.

    I do not recommend the salads. McDonald's has better salads.

  3. My taste in pizza carries no disrespect towards you!

    An oft-repeated conversation:

    "Why are you here on your day off?"

    "I'm hungry and want some food."

    "Yes, but why are you here?"

    "… nearby/open/cheap/etc.."

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