113 thoughts on “Porksima Centauri

    1. A recent large study suggests that up to 40% of dementia in the U.S. is driven by modifiable risk factors including hypertension, obesity, and physical inactivity. Right now, there are no good pharmacological treatments for cognitive decline and neurodegeneration. In their absence, some of the strongest scientifically documented benefits to brain function come from physical exercise.

      Nah. I'd rather just drink the blood of the young, thanks.

      1. I did a couple caves around here long ago. Did make me a little nervous at times. Luckily there's only a few difficult ones around and wasn't willing to drive for hours to get the fix. This was before the Kartchner Caverns reveal.

  1. Hoo-lee sheepshit

    | crazy ass moments in american politics
    @ampol_moment

    Russian president Boris Yeltsin gets blackout drunk, strips to his underwear and wanders outside of the White House looking for pizza. (1994) |

    I don't remember this, strangely enough, but I want to believe that the SS rolled up to the Pizza place with a drunk, almost naked Russian President demanding pie.

    That's a story for the grandkids and would make a great movie, joining a grand tradition of | drunk Russian leaders in film. |

    1. Holllllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeshit. I remember that. Can't say I heard it in '59, . but eventually.

      What prompted it?

          1. So not much had changed by the time I was hearing it on the Doctor Demento Show on Sunday nights throughout the 70s/80s. So drunk.

  2. Too much going on to keep up with, so , on a lighter, local topic: My friends have a new rainwater storage tank. Now that it's actually raining some, it has filled-up [ lotta roof ] and overflows. They have plans for directing the overflow, which plans I fear are going to involve me. I have already been involved in quickly digging out a trench to direct it away from the house. It's now gonna get complicated My vision of the future:

    <img src="https://i.makeagif.com/media/7-23-2018/B8M6Zk.gif&quot; width="300" height="300">

      1. Second Kevin was my roommate in Georgia. A boring academic nerd Most memorable was the first few months of hearing him muttering sweetthings on the phone with his girlfriend Anne back in KY. "I'm a true-blue Kentuckian", he would proudly proclaim. When she came to visit, she was a sweet, mousey young lady, Classic couple.
        By about March he had dumped her for a , [can't quickly describe her any other way than ] Valkyrie. Husky, chested, brash blond that coulda kicked his ass if she ever had a mind to. The rest of us thought it was hilarious.

        Oh yeah, edited to add, Valkyrie worked a vegetarian restaurant with a couple members of the B-52's.

        1. One of my greatest disappointments in life was getting rejected by, if not a Valkyrie, perhaps an Amazon. I was 6'4", she was 6'4", and a knockout. She had better taste and higher aspirations, so nothing doing.

      1. Two of the Kevins I've known, whenever they opened their mouth, everyone else shouted "shut up, Kevin". It seems to be universal.

    1. First Kevin I was knew was in Little League . He was at least a year older, but looked maybe three years older. Just a muscular hairy dude. He was a good athlete so he often pitched, until other kids stopped catching for him because he could throw wicked hard, and wild as can be. Scared 'em. So he asked if I would catch . Uh, sure, why not. I figured the batter and ump and spectators were more at risk than me. I never got bopped at all.

    2. Third Kevin was friend of a friend here first years at the U of A. Played b-ball with us once in a while.
      Story is relayed a couple months later that he had taken a train back to CA. for summer break. He also made tea of jimson weed to make the trip a little more interesting. Woke up a couple weeks later in a psych ward. Came back and tried law school.. Never passed the bar as far as I know.

    3. Master Rebecca Schoenkopf, Wonkette Editrix, King
      @commiegirl1

      well I guess Ricky Shiffer was just more upset about it than you were Kevin.

      1. UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE

        NPR
        @NPR
        · 2h
        Voters like to see a sense of authenticity in candidates, especially in Texas. But cursing and vulgar language in front of children and the elderly more often than not crosses the line.

  3. Desert Oracle
    Volume 1: Strange True Tales from the American Southwest
    Narrated by Ken Layne

    Release date: 08-30-22

    Oh, I'll get it. But if he does it in his laconic Desert Oracle Radio voice, it's going to be hard to listen to.

      1. I really shouldn't.

        It'll probably be great. Just wondered for a minute how it's going to sound without the ethereal soundscape behind it.

  4. Ya know, playin' these musical instrument thingies would be easier if one wasn't a talentless dumbfuck.
    Just sayin'…..

    1. I think I hit my pinnacle the day I set it aside. The world rejoiced!
      Actually, I used to be pretty decent. Between arthritis and tinnitus, I'm fucked.

        1. I don't have the fine motor skills anymore. I have a yard that keeps my gross motor skills honed, though. These days I'm trimming trees from the overhead wires. Bought a 14' telescoping pruner/lopper that makes it almost fun.

          1. I'm not sure I ever did. At least keyboard keys are bigger than fingers. Why I had to go find wide-neck guitars.

          2. I quit in 1964, so not that much of an accomplishment. I wanted to play fiddle, instructor would have none of that. Since it was a rented instrument, I had to give it up. I got a Chromonica 64 so I could continue annoying my siblings. Then my first guitar, which went to Goodwill when I ran away. Lost my 2nd guitar under similar, though even more consequential circumstances.

          3. But acoustic only back then. 1st was a "Bradford", WT Grant's brand, made by Guyatone.
            2nd was a Yamaha FG something. My memory tells me it was a 60, but the books don't recognize that designation.

  5. Restraint.
    So [minus boring details ] ….the tweet from a guy who is a very good punster….

    @DocAtCDI
    ·
    "My brother is dating a girl named Rosemary… I don't know what he season her…"

    The gang that follows and replies seems like a very clean group , yet the obvious amid all the spice puns was

    reply was cumin

    I did not tweet that. Wanted to.

        1. Was doing an agonizing reappraisal after one month on Twitter, but decided to stay after seeing The Inside of a Cello!

          1. There's lotsa good stuff. Filtering is a regular thing to go through for me. Like somedays when there's tweet after tweet with the same clip of Fucker Carlson or similar. Time to mute or go torture some instrument.

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